A TRANSSEXUAL LLAMA FARMER

No, I mean besides Michael Jackson!

HER STORY

A GLIMPSE OF THE FUTURE

Two interesting blurbs in the NY TIMES recently. Remember as we head into election season, that democracy cannot function without an informed electorate. (Translation: if your ass is completely ig'nunt, you can't even know which candidate is best for your own fucking interests!) And how can we possibly sift through the government's propaganda featured on stations like the FOX without a balanced viewpoint from the left? I guess the NY Times would be considered the most prominent left-leaning paper, though of course, the NY Times and CNN (so "liberal" that some Ohioans refer to it as Communist News Network) have both publicly apologized for either not asking tough enough questions about the government's battle crys leading up to Iraq or in one case, actually misrepresenting the facts to make Bush's case for war seem stronger.

Now two of the latest from the NY TIMES via the Huffpo:

1. The liberal newspaper surprises everyone who is still able to think past sports, Oprah and PROJECT RUNWAY, that Bill Kristol will join the paper's staff as a columnist. A few of his press incredentials?

FROM HUFFPO:

Kristol, a prominent neo-conservative who recently departed Time magazine in what was reported as a "mutual" decision, has close ties to the White House and is a well-known proponent of the war in Iraq. Kristol also is a regular contributor to Fox News' Special Report with Brit Hume.

MORE ON HUFFPO

2. The anti-war republican candidate Ron Paul is smeared in blog which claims he has Nazi ties. According to the editorial, Paul has receiveved campaign donations and even appeared at white nationalist groups' dinners. BOTH allegations turned out to be untrue, yet the venerable old Gray Lady--no, not Lypsinka!--that's what they call the NY TIMES for some reason--noted her errors in detail. I invite you to check out some of the scathing comments which follow the TIME's retraction at NYTIMES to fully comprehend how betrayed the readers of the bastion of liberal news feel about this.

Granted, you can't be a republican candidate without having given speeches to a variety of fruit loops with a bible in one hand and a shotgun in the other. But why on earth would the NY TIMES want to smear the only anti-war republican presidential candidate--who seems to be raising a shocking amount of campaign dollars yet who is rarely heard from in the news or polls? In the spirit of that question, I beg you to watch the video clip below. It's perfect for viewing on New Year's Day, since it provides a glimpse into the future which is instantly sobering. Oh yeah, and HAPPY NEW YEAR! I won't claim that I'm overly optimistic for the future, but it is very empowering to know your enemies and the secretive fronts you aren't even aware that you are fighting them on. Until you've lost.



A scene from the movie Zeitgeist - watch it free in it['s entirety online at ZEITGEISTMOVIE.COM. Or buy the dvd for $5!

ROCK OUT WITH YOUR (IOWA) CAUCUS OUT

Not really qualified to judge rapping skillz--in fact, just typing that "z" after skill liked to kill me--but this guy is rapping for a good cause--voting in the Iowa, I wonder if only 5% of Iowans, as he claims, show up to vote in this election? Nothing would surprise me in a country which cast more ballots for American Idol contestants than their president. But it really is pitiful--if only 5% of Iowans even vote? The all-important president-making bellwether is held in a backward state which doesn't even care? Yikes! I mean YAY, DEMOCRACY!

ADORA'S HOT NEW OPERA-HOUSE #!

The Queen of South Beach performed at Click on 12/23.

HEE HEE!

The Italian man said, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the end."

The Frenchman boasted, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes."

The Gay man said, "Well, last week my boyfriend and I also had sex. I rubbed his body all over with Massage Oil. We made love, and he screamed for over six hours."

The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your boyfriend scream for six hours?"

The Gay man said, "I wiped my hands on the bedspread."

CARNAVAL'S GAY DANCE 2007

An effervescent hostess interviews colorfully-costumed sex changes in pulsating Rio de Janeira! What more could you want? Except maybe that it was in english? Apparently, Hudson, NY's mayoral candidate Lady Esther Gyn (who sent me these videos) was also interview, but perhaps the footage was not inclue since the only words the slut knows in portuguese translate to top, bottom, and elephant trunk.



And if you too are a whore who loves to drool over fresh meat, check out the handsome hunks in Mr. Gay Brazil 2007! Makes me wanna go eat some rice and beans--out they assholes! But why, oh why do they have to use DANCING QUEEN as the winner's theme? I interview the winner towards the end in a dramatic new wig look.



This clip is from the same pageant, but a few real girls try to tempt the gay boys, with every excuse used to show their tits and asses.



Andd about that elephant trunk...

GRETTIR KABARET

I would never advocate drug use, but if you should be the type who enjoys recreational drug use, you'll really take to GRETTIR KABARET, a short which was recently shown at the 2007 Reyjkjavek Film Festival. One central image is brand new, bouncy blonde wigs, with an object whirling in the middle which could either be a prescription drug capsule, or a phallic object. So I really identified with this sucker! Enjoy!

CRAZY WOMAN EATS DIRT

Need I say more?

WHO THE FUCK GOES TO THE ZOO ON XMAS?

HI, TIGER!



So sorry about those kids who were chewed when a tiger at a San Francisco zoo escaped, but what kind of Xmas tradition is going to the zoo? Please tell me that they don't rope those animals into a stinking nativity scene in heathern San Fran! Or could the culprits be Siegfried and Roy impersonators?

Now the news coverage is asking if the tiger may have been taunted by it's victims, since a shoe and some blood were found inside the beast's cage. Child! No one told me that Flotilla was performing at the San Francisco City Zoo! Please tell me that shoe wasn't a size 13 Payless pump! Cuz that bitch Flotilla really puts on a really big shoe--two of them, in fact! I hope she wasn't executing her eye-popping routine on her "audience's" eyeball--the one that landed her ass in jail recently!



On the phone with that Flo last night, I mentioned Bhutto's assassination and was getting ready to tell her about the former Pakistani prime minister's last words in a posthumous video message courtesy taped for CNN's Wolf Blitzer, when a trick beeped in on the other line. I guess Flotilla, who hadn't realized that I'd clicked over, had just kept yakking, so when I clicked back over, she was spouting this gibberish: "I want my dick sucked by a toothless moose." Turns out she was propositioning me, but in my shall we say, "enlightened" state, a moment of hilarity ensued as I mistakenly thought that Flo was suggesting the moose pick-up line were Bhutto's last words. If, only if! Can you imagine the instant, earth-shattering worldwide enlightment which would have ensued had Benazir begged "I want my dick sucked by a toothless moose?" as her epitaph? Flotilla must be shipped to Pakistan immediately to calm them. She wouldn't be the first whore in Lahore.

Actually, her message was (paraphrasing) "If I'm killed, blame Musharaf", who she had been asking for beefed-up security. And nobly, that she knew there was a risk, she loved Pakistan enough to take that risk for it's democracy. What a contrast in Bhutto and our nation's leader! We've got a spoiled, draft-dodging frat boy who will gladly sacrifice soldiers's lives while purporting to spread democracy--ie military occupation--through a gun-barrel.

How dare Bush issue a condemnation of the Bhutto assassination, when he himself is an assassin--remember Saddam Hussein an the chaos his fall plunged Iraq into?--who is condemned around the world as a military aggressor whose actions continue to destablize the Middle East?

Confused by my own country's politics, I won't pretend to be an expert on Pakistan's. But the fact that a woman rose to power in a muslim nation is extraordinary. And with such dramatic eye-liner! Sometimes uner Chanel glasses! In fact, at one memorial, they participants carried one poster with glasses an one without. I'm sure that her make-up rates up there with most alarming of new concerns caused by her assassination, but not only was she a voice for moderation and democracy in a troubled region, she also featured immaculately applied liquid eye-liners, and mama gurl had some peepers. Such a shame that one rarely sees war-paint on the lovely, exotic ladies of the Near East. I don't wanna build her up as an angel. By the end of the day of her demise, the news was already reporting that she was bounced from the office of prime minister twice for corruption. Her father was hung in the 70's, with two of her brothers shot as well. Since she came out of exile this fall, there had already been one attempt on her life. Unfortunately, since the party was family-run, there's really no one to replace that much needed voice of moderation. Well, at least a voice of moderation and corruption.

But the republican candidates are already crying "terrorism," since protecting us on that front is their strong suit. No one believes that a democrat has the backbone to battle the terrorists, and who could deny that backbone isn't their strong suit? "America's Mayor" Giuliani is already pointing to the assassination's terrorist ties as the reason that only a mayor who allowe 9/11 to happen can protect her. Click here to watch an pretty incredible tale of his inability to provide the fire department with working radios since 1993, the year of the first WTC attacks. Yeah, the World Trade Center, where the brilliant strategist decided to house the emergency response center for the towers. But Rudy, what if there's an emergency? Oops! Yet somehow, this flop of a man is thought better able to battle terrorists better than his presidential opponents.

MSNBC rebroadcast Keith Olbermann's blistering anti-Giuliani rant tonight.



THIS TRASH ACCEPTED AN ENDORSEMENT FROM BEWIGGED CHEESEBALL CHUCK NORRIS. IS THIS IS ARKANSAS/IOWA THING OR IS--AS I'VE ALWAYS THOUGHT--CHUCK IS THE MOST REVOLTING STAR EVER?



One of Giuliani's opponents, Mike Huckabee, is such a dumb-ass that he referred to Pakistan's eastern border with Afghanistan. Mike, Pakistan borders India on the east. I'm no geography scholar, so I may not have known this myself, but I'm not running for president. I'm running for vice president. Of either party. But that pales in comparison to Huckabee's first mis-step with the Bhutto murder. His office initially sent out a letter of apology to Pakistan for the assassination, then realized their error and changed it to a letter of condolences.

For that last bit of info, I thank Rachel Maddow's Air America broadcast 6:00-8:00 M-F--and I mean Monday through Friday, not male to female transsexual. Though she is a slightly butch dyke. OK, well not exactly butch, but her hair's short and she wears no make-up and nary a dress. Anyway, she also made another interesting observation today. Since Bhutto was taken out while the Bushes were holidaying in Crawford, Rachel reminded us that the Bushes inhabit a ranch. A ranch without livestock--well, unless Barbara Bush is happens to be visiting. And today, Ms. Maddow broadcast that the Bush family home where George grew up fell victim to arson. The entire of the unique library's books were burnt--and he hadn't even finished coloring them yet! OK, sorry! There's a writers' strike on!

AIR AMERICA'S RACHEL MADDOW



I'm so glad this huckster Huckabee is being exposed. For a moment, he surged to the lead among the republican candidates. Finally, the evangelical community had found a candidate conservative enough for them. A former Southern Baptist minister, I'm not sure if he's had an unchanging position on abortion, but I know he once advocated quarantining AIDS victims. The bug-eyed freak set Iowans at ease with his sense of humor, as well as managed to combine two major (if conflicting) policy issues essential to those charming born-agains: love of the Lord and love of guns! Not only did Mike take out a pheasant in an Iowa shoot-out to prove his prowess, he's let it be known that he feels God is with him when he's shooting, and an angel guides the bullet to the duck, killing it. How blessed! Rachel asked why the duck didn't have an angel to protect it. But look on the bright sie. If Huckabee wins, he can just shoot a few bombs up in the air and have Go direct them to Osama an the rest of the terrorists.

Rotted-ass Romney claimed to be lifelong hunter, and then diappointed Iowans when forced to admit that he'd misrepresented himself: he's hunted only twice. Sheesh! And that's right after he was forced to admit that in fact he had not watched his dad march with Martin Luther King. And that liar really needs to lose the hair-grease. I know it's Reagan-esque, but it ain't workin' for him, and he is a handsome liar. But how could you be so sorry that you actually look back to the Reagan years and see that Alzheimer's-riddled greaser as inspiration to model yourself after? Pew!

Of course, I did love to see Huckabee go after Romney, snarkily asking in some interview that didn't Mormons believe that Satan was Jesus's brother? Uhm, someone who has never existed may not actually have any siblings, can they? I'm so glad that duck-hunting and Satan's geneaology are the core issues that men vying for the presidency concern themselves with.



I concern myself with the presidential dose of glamour worn by Miss Ross at the Kennedy Center Honors. The bitch looked Diana-mite in a strapless white gown with rhinestone-studded nude illusion sleeves, complete with built-on bracelets and collar! In her phony way, she actually seemed to be having fun, trying to whoop it up with brain-dead co-honoree Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys. And I couldn't help but notice that Diana's daughter Tracee Ellis Ross was among the first to leap to her feet to start the standing ovulation for her the musical tribute to the Supreme one. Maybe she's a more loyal than she is band member. And honey, Diana's boys are so such mini-studs that I'm renewing my N.A.M.B.L.A. membership.

AN EARLY VENTURE INTO RHINESTONE-FLECKED NUDE ILLUSION ON THIS INSANELY TITLED ALBUM



Why on earth would they give a medley of I'M COMING OUT/ UPSIDE DOWN to Ciara? Her silver outfit was Diana-ish, but Miss ONE TWO STOP doesn't have the chops for those heavenly songs. Or the beauty! Wasn't Beyonce available or is there friction now that Beyonce portrayed the Diana character in DREAMGIRLS? Yolanda Adams is ridiculously pretty, and really turned out the REACH OUT AND TOUCH finale. How on earth can George Bush not cringe while hearing lyrics like "Reach out and touch somebody's hand/Make this world a better place if you can." Even though Yolanda's voice has way more power than Diana's, there is something so irresistible and expressive about Diana's thin voice. It's so damned womanly! And she often chose incredible songs. She was the Beyonce of her day. Sorry kids, y'all have been cheated!

THOUGH BEYONCE CERTAINLY SHOWED SHE COULD ROCK A RHINESTONE OR TWO ON THIS HOT COVER!



H.R.H. PRINCESS DIANDRA FAITHFULLY RECREATED THIS LOOK TO SYNCH "LOVE CHILD" AT WIGSTOCK 88?



Diana, who I love to death but she is at her phoniest in this Xmas medley and working her malnourished marionette look, and the back-ups are barely seen. However, the first glimpse of Flo does offer a surly glance and maybe later a missing tooth? And then the whole show explodes into a swirling chiffon caftan version of MY FAVORITE THINGS.

SUPREMES CHRISTMAS MEDLEY




Diana's early look is so extreme that it's odd to imagine that she was even considered pretty, especially since black guys tend to look like curvier shapes. Not a wacky stringbean in a short, boyish wig! I've read that initially, the softer, more bootylicious Mary Wilson was considered the group's fox. Luckily for her, as Di moved further into the spotlight as the group's front woman, the later 1960's ushered in the age of skinny beauties like Twiggy. So her waifish figure kin of came into it's own. Last night, I watched a few Supremes/Temptations specials--in an attempt to add crossover appeal to their artists, Berry Gordy put them on Broadway singing popular showtunes, many with dreadful arrangements. Mary was really moving--man, she really had it. But I guess "Diane" wanted stardom more, and so she's really "giving", too. Giving her pussy to the boss, that is! The wild thing about her looks is that like Dolly Parton, Diana started off wiggier with more make-up, wearing much less as she aged. And looking fantastic in every phase! In the clip below, her bouffed bob with oversized beaed paisley prints is major!

DISCO DIANA IN LESS MAKE-UP--20 YEARS LATER! A MARVEL! AN SHE'S DOING THAT MOUTH THING!



She's not exactly beautiful, but man, was she ever magical! Conratulations to her for her honor and thanks for the music!

THE SUPREMES AND THE TEMPTATIONS FROM THEIR TCB (Taking Care of Business) SPECIAL

THIS SUNDAY!

BORN IN THE WRONG BODY

Tonight at 11 PM, MSNBC is scheduled to premiere “Born in the Wrong Body: On the Edge,” a documentary about transgenders in the house/ball community. The producers of the documentary conducted extensive interviews with members of NYC’s transgender community over a number of weeks and even followed some to the House of Latex Ball at Roseland. Expect to see exciting femme queen battle footage from the ball this past August.

The following description is from the MSNBC website:

Born in the Wrong Body: On the Edge (Premiere)
"Ballroom" is a world unto its own—synonymous with outrageous costumes and competitive voguing. It's a wild and spectacular scene, where transgender people are in their element—and celebrated for who they are. But the over-the-top clothes and party atmosphere belie the serious problems that transgender people face in the everyday world.

MSNBC is Ch. 14 on Time Warner Cable in NYC. Not sure about other cable systems. Check local listings, etc.

JEFFREE STARR SAYS HELL NAW

Also starring Sharolaid, a shit-obsessed step-chid of Shirley K. Liquor. Long, and extra-retarded!

BRING BACK THE GAUZE!

FROM LA TIMES VIA HUFFPO:

BALTIMORE -- Yolanda Vazquez watched a news broadcast on a high-definition television for the first time with mixed emotions.

She was impressed by the way it rendered the anchors in such vivid detail. "It's amazing," she said, "like you're not in 3-D but in 15-D."

But awe gave way to self-conscious jitters once Vazquez, a reporter and anchor at Maryland Public Television, realized that her turn in front of an HD camera was coming.

"You're really under the microscope," she said, "and if you've got a new pimple or a stray hair, it's obvious."

Such is the lot of on-air talent as momentum builds for the most significant technological change in broadcasting since the advent of color TV. Prompted by a federal mandate to switch from analog to digital broadcasting by Feb. 17, 2009, stations around the country are steadily upgrading their equipment to transmit shows in HD.

With at least four times the resolution of traditional equipment, HD cameras and television sets will display Vazquez and other small-screen personalities in images as large, clear and detailed as they are unforgiving.

The change has sparked particular concern among those who perform live. Unlike movies and recorded programs, on which retakes and post-production tweaks can compensate for poor lighting or bad makeup, live shows provide no safety net.

More ominously, in a profession in which personal appearance can be pivotal to success, veteran TV newscasters worry that HDTV could turn a spotlight on imperfections that traditional TV technology overlooked.

"These people are under pressure to look good, and frankly, there aren't a lot of 22-year-old anchors out there, so this really scares them," said Doug McAward, co-founder of Kett Cosmetics, a New York company that specializes in Digital Age makeup.

Older makeup techniques don't work on HDTV because thick layers of powder, pancake and cream show up as clearly as the blemishes they're intended to cover. "If somebody has an imperfection," McAward said, "you want to cover just that imperfection, not coat the entire face to cover it up."

Makeup artists at HD stations with big budgets use airbrushes to apply specially formulated cosmetics. Their makeup contains no silicon or mica because those substances make people look shiny and frosted under the brighter lights that HD requires. Also absent are kaolin clay and other materials that appear to cake in HD.

But even the best makeup can fail under digital scrutiny. During an appearance on "Late Night With Conan O'Brien" in October, CNN host Anderson Cooper said he contemplated plastic surgery after seeing himself in HD.

MORE: LATIMES

LAST FEW XMAS YUCKS

CHARO SINGS FELIZ NAVIDAD

THANK YOU, GAWKER! Her bugle-beaded Xmas tam is heavenly!

A CLONE FOR XMAS!

Maybe for next year!

SUBWAY STRIPPER

HOWIE PYRO'S XMAS E-CARD

GREETING

RUDOLPH VIDEO MASH-UP

RUDOLPH VIDEO MASH-UP

FROM DIVINE'S MOM!

"WISDOM" FROM THE WEB

Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2008

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8
Men have two emotions:
Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day,
teach a person to use the internet
and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky ..
Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile
when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,
lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to Criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00
and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?
Number 2

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought For 2008 :
We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration?

HOLIDAY GRACE...JONES

She's performing DO OR DIE on an incredible set. Unfortunately, she's letting the set do most of the work for her and doesn't even percolate a little during that hot dance break towards the end! But when you're gorgeous, bald and in a structural layered look, who's complaining?

WHY I WORSHIP MYSPACE

MEET THE GAL ON HER MYSPACE PAGE!

IF THIS DOESN'T PUT YOU IN THE HOLIDAY MOOD...

MORE XMAS FARTING!

Description from youtube by this clip's editor:

Holiday Fart Special. All-Star Cast! In order of Appearance: Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers, Barbara Streisand, Celine Dion, Christina Aguilera, Hilary Duff, Ashley Tisdale, Destiny's Child, Mariah Carey, Regis Philbin & Kelly Ripa, Beyonce, Elvis Presley. Enjoy the show! This video is not a personal attack on anyone. I do not advocate hatred toward people. This is only comedy, so please don't get upset over it. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

Holiday farting! Christ, was I upset!

This montage is long, but it can be a gas in parts.

ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

THE LATE, GREAT ISABEL SANFORD AS WEEZY JEFFERSON



Think it's a joke? Well, actually I got several replies!

Fuck Me While I Eat Linguine w/ Clam Sauce and Watch The Jeffersons

Reply to: pers-515476162@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-20, 4:51PM

39, 4'10", 190, thinning black hair, gray eyes, bushy Hitler mustache, hairy back but smooth everywhere else. Often told I look like a handsomer Danny DeVito. Looking for a buddy to come by and fuck me while I eat linguine with white clam sauce. I will have "The Jeffersons" playing on DVD and insist you shout, "Take it, Weezie" while you fuck me. I will also have a bowl of grated parmesan cheese and hot pepper flakes nearby, which you will season my linguine with as I eat it. When you are ready to cum, you will shout, "Beans don't fry in the kitchen!"

I can host in my Q-shaped apartment on 39th Street between Delancey Street and Ninth Avenue. Please, no weirdos, druggies or African American colored black Oriental Asians of color.

CAGA TIO: THE CATALAN YULE LOG

Starts a little slow, but make sure you watch for the song.

MAURY XMAS

JINGLE FARTS

ZIPPYVIDEOS

DANNY LA RUE ON YOUTUBE!

Thanks to Stella Stein for these! Danny had the gowns!

GRACE JONES MEETS PEE WEE HERMAN

Via WOW TV:

FCC NIGHTMARE

PLEEEEEEEASE FORWARD WIDELY!

The Bush-appointed head of the FCC, a Republican named Kevin Martin, is trying to sneak through new rules that will make megamedia consolidation even easier than it is now. In other words make it easier for huge corporations to own and operate all of the newspapers, magazines, movie companies, and TV and radio stations, and to distribute, and censor what we read, see, and hear there (that includes the internet, natch). He wants to do this before Christmas and is betting on the public not noticing or responding in time.

Check out the video on this page. It explains the issue succinctly and cleverly:

FREEPRESS

And please sign the petition. They will not contact you if you uncheck the little box there. But maybe you'd want them to contact you if it's about shit like this!

Three years ago the same attempt on the part of a different FCC chairman was shot down by hundeds of thousands of Americans being alerted in the nick of time and signing online petitions etc for Congress to take action. Apparently this time there's another groundswell of support for Congressional action. But we only have a few days to take action.

XMAS JOKE

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

"In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said,"You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.

"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint
Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.
He shook them and said, "They're bells."

Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "These are Carols."

And So The Christmas Season Begins......

BUSH'S XMAS CARD

GO ELF YOURSELF!

I got elfed by Lady Esther Gin.

ELFYOURSELF

JACKIE BEAT RAPED BY SANTA!

Poor thing! First she gets her dream gift of a pussy, and then she gets raped! Two new videos by Austin Young.

ULTRA NATE: GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT

MISS THING IS WORKING WAR PAINT!

ANJELAH JOHNSON: BEAUTIFUL NAIL

HILARIOUS STAND-UP!

CHECK OUT SHANNON'S SMILE

WRETCHED!But at leat it's not spelled Shannyn. This is a video teaser about a new reality show which profiles moms who enter their offspring into kiddie pageants. This show might just be sick enough to watch!

JEZEBEL.COM

NEW CATHOLIC COLORING BOOK

FROM NEWSWEEK.COM:



Does this no child's behind left alone apply to those horny-ass priests in their gloryhole-equipped confessionals?

SO CUTE!

KEVIN AVIANCE'S NEW ALBUM!

Actually, it's a drag queen from Houston circa 1962. I WOULD KILL TO HEAR THIS--LOOKS LIKE A RIOT!

WOMAN PISSED ABOUT HER BUTT IMPLANTS

This news anchor cant hold it together when reporting a story about woman who is not happy about her recent butt implants. And after seeing what they look like, I would be pissed too.


Woman Pissed Bout New Butt Implants - Watch more free videos

RETARDID POLICEMAN, EPISODE #4

JERGENS' ADS W/ BEWITCHED FLAIR

NOTORIOUS H.I.T.

SPANISH CONDOM AD

THE BRIDDE WHO NEEDED A SHOWER--AND A SHAVE!

From CYCLIVE.COM:

Iraqi police captured wanted terrorists dressed as a bride and a groom and trying to flee. Apparently, the young terrorist was dressed in a white bridal gown with a veil over his face. But, the soldiers became suspicious of the all male wedding group. So, when they raised the veil they found a man with scrubby facial hair underneath.

(Maybe the one gauntlet/cast tipped them off a little bit, too.)

WATCH THE CAPTURE: CYLIVE

MAYBE THE CHICKEN DIDN'T SWALLOW IT

Bracelet Found in Chicken After 25 Years

AP Posted: 2007-11-30 11:57:54

FAIRMONT, Minn. (Nov. 29) - More than two decades after Aaron Giles lost his identity bracelet, he's finding how it was discovered tough to swallow. A meat cutter at Olson Locker in Fairmont came across the shiny object in a chicken gizzard and saw a name, address and phone number engraved on it.

"I've heard of livestock swallowing unusual objects, but this situation stands out," Mark Olson, who owns the meat locker, told the Sentinel of Fairmont.

Giles had lived in Fairmont as a child and played hide-and-seek and other games with his brothers in their grandfather's barn near Sherburn.

"I would spend most of my time out at his farm, and that's the only place I can think of that I would have lost it," Giles said about his bracelet on Thursday. The 31-year-old said he thinks the bracelet was lost when he was 4 or 5.

The barn was dismantled a few years ago, and Giles thinks his bracelet was imbedded in materials used to construct another barn in Elmore, about 45 miles away.

The bracelet was found in a chicken that came from an Elmore farm.

Olson was able to track down Giles' father, who had moved to Arizona. Giles, who now lives in Gloucester, Mass., said he received his old bracelet in September.

"It was in pretty immaculate shape. Everything was working on it, and all the engravings on it were still legible," Giles said. "It was quite the surprise."

Giles said he expects the bracelet to stay in his family for many years to come. "I have no plans on trying to lose it again," he said.

THE NIGHT THE LIGHTS WENT OUT IN GEORGIA

Dixie Carter goes off on a pageant bimbo in a DESIGNING WOMEN episode. I never cared for show and couldn't understand why the reptilian Dixie never favored eye make-up, but she works it in this clip.

TABBOO!'S XMAS VIDEO

Putting the Garland back in Xmas, a demented Tabboo! (aka super-talented painter Stephen Tashjian) spreads a little holiday jeer in this Judy tribute.

RAFFAELA CARRA: RUMORE

Italo-disco at it's ___________. You decide.

LATIFAH'S GETTING MARRIED?

TO A GIRL! MEDIATAKEOUT



May I recommend that the bridesmaids carry these stunning pussy purses to really ring in the occasion in a style which is instantly classic and cuntemporary. More styles here: ARTGODDESS