March 12, 2007


I think I posted this awhile but I love it so much that it deserves a re-post!


1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair
Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks.
Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks,
Write "For Smuggling Diamonds" or "Sex Lessons"

7. Finish All Your sentences with
"In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don t use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends
You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Coworkers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, 'Rock Bottom'.

17. When The Money Comes Out of The Cash Machine, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The
Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To
Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......
repost this to make someone smile.

It's Called Therapy.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

My head is full of shit like that. I think I need therapy!

Lesbian barstaff- when you are serving a man give his change back in small coins. Slap it in a puddle of beer on the bar top and then walk away. Revel in his fury as he tries to retrieve his wet coins.

Tear the last few pages out of a book your friend is reading.

When you win at bingo smile smugly at the losers behind you, who were waiting for one number

Old people when making home made pies for the over 60's social club, take out your dentures and crimp the edges of the pastry with them. Your friends will marvel at the fancy edging.

Old People: In a supermarket, if you come across a pregnant teenage horror give them a theatrical glare, if they don't see you doing it the first time, follow them around the ailses until they do!

7:05 PM  

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