SPLASH'S DISCO TEA

SHAKE IT, BABY, SHAKE IT!



A RAVENOUS FRIEND PREPARES TO EAT SHERRY VINE AND THEATRE COUTURE'S ERIK JACKSON



H.R.H. PRINCESS DIANDRA WENT ON DESPITE A TRAGIC CAB ACCIDENT WHICH SEVERED BOTH OF HER ARMS!



If you are out and about in NYC on a Sunday night, please stop Splash for our DIsco Tea every Sunday from 7-11. It's early, so it's so casual that it's almost like not going out! Last week was a blast! Princess Diandra as Diana Ross put on a helluva show, lip-synching to NO ONE GETS THE PRIZE and THE BOSS, two heavenly, dramatic disco classics written by Ashford and Simpson. (Of course, she showed up so fucking late that I thought she was impersonating Grace Jones, mk?) The crowd parted as the boa-wrapped diva swished and swirled down onto the dancefloor (closer proximity to tippers) but of course, always hit all of the music's stops, horn hits, drum fills and drum-breaks. And naturally, Miss D grabbed someone from the audience to pull them close during NO ONE's boogie breakdown and then shove them aside when Diana says "Back off!" It was so old school that it was new. Or should I say nu? Or should that be I, hereby retire? Don't answer that!

So we've traded in our poppers for walkers and we're hitting the town again! Seen: RuPaul, Bravo's Andy Cohen, high fayshion hairdresser, Pyramid regular and Nan Goldin model (he's on the cover of her book THE OTHER SIDE) Jimmy Paul and Flotilla Debarge in a kicky Dreamgirls tee. You may recall that Flo faces charges in a few months for brawling with a couple at some forgotten club, so she hasn't been spotted out as much lately. However, she arrived early enough for me to spin a few songs which I knew might never pack a dance floor, but which she and I would enjoy. Like Melba Moore's cover of the BeeGees' YOU STEPPED INTO MY LIFE and Bonnie Pointers' FREE ME FROM MY FREEDOM. The latter features disco's only known banjo break, as well as lyrics like "Tie me to a tree, handcuff me" during which Flotilla would cross her arms as if she were being jailed. Hilarious!



Splash's handsome manager Ray emcees a line dance every week. The crowd seems to love it, and actually manages to do the Hustle. I have never for the life of me been able to learn the Electric Slide, the Hustle, the Llambada or the Chicken Noodle Soup with a Soda on the Side dances. Yet these guys and gals seem to manage to accomplish it drunk, every week as I look on in amazement. Of course, a 6' 3" muscular hunk with a deep voice like Ray telling you what to do with your legs can prove somewhat irresistible.

There's a new hostess, and she'll murder me on the dancefloor for no remembering her name but she's new, dammit! But she certainly has a knack for grabbing the foxy fellers. I'm not usually turned on by sweat, but DAYAM, BIG BOY!



PRINCESS BRITTANY AND BLOOLIPS LEGEND LAVINIA CO-OP



Vivacious hostess Bianca Del RIo certainly engages all the customers, when she takes a break from engaging the bartenders with drink requests. Which is about 5 minutes out of each night. But she can handle her liquor--she's from New Orleans! The whore is actually flying home every week to to emcee at Oz each Saturday night until Mardi Gras, and then back for an early gig (7-11) on Sundays? Talk about a rough commute!

BIANCA SAYS "MAKE MINE A DOUBLE!"



BIANCA WITH DANCE MUSIC VETERAN KEVIN WILLIAMS


SHAKE IT, BABY!

BIANCA SAYS "THAT'S ITALIAN!"



BIANCA STEALS BUNNY'S HUSBAND



BIANCA DIES. HUNT FOR NEW HOSTESS BEGINS. LET'S MAKE THE SEARCH INTO A FUCKING REALITY SHOW/COMPETITON!

I'll be in Florida for the weeks of February 14th and 21st. Replacing me the first week is circuit star Manny Lehman and for the second week it's Grammy award-winning Hex Hector! And that nuyorican knows his classic disco! Unti then, it's Granny award-winning granvestite dj Lady Bunion.

Last week, I graced the cover of HX and since I'm off the stands, I'll reprint my interview here for thos of you who might have missed it!



1 So how did this party come about, whose idea was it - Christina's? I'm just curious which came first: The idea of a Disco Tea or the idea of a Lady Bunny tea where the disco theme came second.

Rub it in: I came it second! It was Christina's idea. "Tina" really makes any night special, doncha think? She had hired me a year back to do a disco-themed birthday party for break-dancing interior designer Tony Furnabio and it was a hoot.

2 What do you say to those people who say, Disco is dead!

I say "Drop dead!" I dj at lot mixed corporate parties and even if straight guys are requesting 50 Cent all night, put on GOT TO BE REAL and they all hit the floor. Besides, half of today's hip-hop and dance hits are based on a one bar sample of an old disco tune like Chic Cheer (Love Like This by Faith Evans), Heartbeat (Hotstepper) or the Abba sample used in Madonna's Hung Up). Instead of hearing one bar repeated over and over--come out and hear the whole fucking song, dammit! Beyonce's Crazy In Love is an old soul sample, too. These kids need to be educated and I mean to do it! And if the kids are over 8 inches long, their "education" can include one-on-one "counseling sessions"in the dj booth!

If it were dead, could Bunny bring it back?

Honey, if I could raise the dead, I'd become Flotilla Debarge's manager!



4 What do you love about disco?

It's only the most brilliant dance music ever! Anthems from that era are constantly being remade or remixed from I Will Survive to Love Sensation to Lady Marmalade. At it's height, disco became so huge that even rockers like Kiss and Rod Stewart recorded dance tracks. And when the money was in dance music, it attracted the top songwriters, producers and artists. So the quality of this music is incredible. Do you think the dance music of today is quality music? Newsflash! It ain't even music! There's not even a vocal and it sounds like one dull-ass "progressive" drum track mixed into another. "Soundtrack To Tweak By" is so worn out that yes, I think a 30-year old quality disco track is fresh by comparison. Everyone I know gripes about mindless circuit sounds played in big clubs. So log off of manhunt.com and get your groove on!

Today, there are no major label dance artists. Ultra Nate, Martha Wash and Deee-Lite in the 90's were really the last ones in this country. Current dance acts may have fantastic voices, but they are relegated to dance 12 inch's without even their photo on it! (Fags, focus! I meant a 12 inch record so quit drooling or turn to the back pages of HX.) In contrast, the disco era cultivated some of the gay community's best-loved stars and some truly outrageous talents and characters from Donna Summer to Sylvester to Grace Jones. They had strong identities so it wasn't just faceless music. That's why singers like Thelma Houston and France Jolie still tour alongside today's dance divas. Who ARE today's dance divas, anyway? I can't name many. Deborah Cox was the last stand-out star with a string of hits and she doesn't even have a record deal now. Plus, she was never intended to be a dance artist. Her songs were simply remixed when they failed on the r & b charts. She had some great remixes but there is not as much money in a dance hit as in an r & b smash, so even talents as cherished as Deborah's are neglected. Classic disco music was written to be uptempo--it isn't remixed ballads which didn't chart.

5 What are your best memories from the disco era?

Well, (ahem!) I was VERY young in the disco era, but I do recall peering excitedly from my crib and shaking my rattle to the beat whenever a disco act appeared on TV. I didn't enjoy this memory at the time it happened, but I have to laugh now because I know from my personal experience that most dj's hate requests. I was in a huge London gay club in 1978. Thinking I would demonstrate how music-savvy I was, I asked the dj "Have you played Shame by Evelyn "Champagne" King yet?" He snarled "Yeah! Six months ago!" I've shied away from making requests ever since then, though I don't mind taking them myself. As long as your request isn't "Give me a drink ticket", "Can you hold my coat" or "Please retire!"

6 Tell me about your history and relationship with Splash. Have you spun other big parties there over the years?

I've mainly performed there, and only dj'ed there one other time when they were trying to have dj's in the coatcheck downstairs. It was winter and they were very busy, so we just gave up on the dj idea since the coats were being drug over the turntables--I spun vinyl then. But I had a blast. I was happy to "help out" security and rifle through coat pockets for drugs, confiscating quite a few baggies--which I'd conveniently forget to turn in.

7 Why is Splash the perfect place for this party?

The sound system is amazing, the cover's low, the drinks are cheap, the naked bartenders are even cheaper, and Avalon's closed!

FUN-LOVING, HUNKY BARTENDER LARRY BULLOCK LOVES HIM A THEME NIGHT!



8 Is this night more about bringing in an older crowd that lived through the era or introducing a younger crowd to that music?

Last week, I put on (You Make Me Feel) Mighty Real and a group of 20-something twinks were squealing alongside 40-somethings. Or maybe they were all in their 40's and some had better plastic surgeons... But for the crowd that knew disco the first time around, they go nuts to hear songs like Native New Yorker played on a big sound system. With it's gospel, soul and latin influences, disco has a joyous, celebratory vibe. Not like today's dark "It's 5 am and I've just peed my pants in a k-hole" dance "music".

Disco or not, why do you think the boys can't seem to get enough of a good Sunday Tea Dance?

One thing hasn't changed over the decades--no, besides Lypsinka's act! Hairdressers have Mondays off, so Sunday is a perfect night out for the gays. Though it is an early night which begins at 7:00, so if you do have to go to work on Monday, you can take advantage of the 2-4-1 until 9 and be in bed drunk by midnight. But really, do that many people in Bush's America even have jobs anymore?

10 Tell me about Bianca del Rio and how she contributes to the evening.

Oh, she does a spectacular job! She's the janitor of the club by day and she keeps the place spotless! Seriously, Bianca is a hoot! She's new on the scene, a recent transplant from New Orleans. The devastating Hurricane Katrina not only left her homeless, but homely! She hosts the night and passes out everything from sparkler rings to cocktails. Some nights she just passes out.

PROMOTER CHRISTINA VISCA, A BOMBED AND FRIGHTENING HELLION, AND DANNY TENAGLIA



11 Do you throw back a few cocktails during your set? And if so, how does that affect your set by the end of the night?

Well, Bianca's a terrible influence on me. Like everyone from NOLA, she's an alcoholic, and she is constantly bringing me my favorite shot--Geritol with a splash of GHB. It's killer! (Literally!) Anyway, though I'd like to think that my song selection is flawless, I'm certainly not the world's greatest mixer. But what other dj is on the floor carrying on with their crowd? OK, so sometimes the song ends an I'm caught on the dancefloor with no music playing-- but who doesn't love surprises? Look, there's a million dj's with seamless mixing skills, but only a few who look great in seamless stockings!

Seriously, even the cheesiest disco record on the tiniest label had a full string and horn sections, latin percussion and dramatic breakdowns. It;s not that I'm drunk, I simply give into the hypnotic hedonism of the sound. It's the music which intoxicates me. You ain't buying it? OK, so Splash's bartenders are not only hunky but very generous. I got so "merry" on Xmas eve that I seem to recall removing my wig and swinging it over my head to the tune of Turn The Beat Around. And speaking of "head", I did play the 17 minute version of McCarthur Park to become "better acquainted" with one of our patrons
in a toilet stall. Just call me the dj with the bj! Oink!

GERALDINE HUNT WITH RICK JAMES. CLICK ON HER NAME TO HEAR MORE ABOUT THE SINGER OF CAN'T FAKE THE FEELING. (I had no clue that she wrote the early 80' hit MURPHY'S LAW for her daughter's group Cheri!



LADY BUNNY'S TOP TEN DISCO CLASSICS

Star Love Cheryl Lynn

Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel Tavares

Get Off Foxy

Don't Stop Til You Get Enough "Michelle" Jackson

Can't Fake The Feeling Geraldine Hunt

Gonna Get Over You France Jolie

Red Light Linda Clifford

Disco Heat Sylvester

Instant Replay Dan Hartman

I'm Coming Out Diana Ross

Heaven Must Have Sent You Bonnie Pointer