DON'T ASS, DON'T TAIL

Army to investigate gay porn allegations

RALEIGH, N.C. (AP) — Army officials are investigating allegations that members of the celebrated 82nd Airborne Division appear on a gay pornography website, a spokeswoman said Friday.

(BUNNY NOTE: Well, dammit! What's the friggin' web address? We want to support our troops in all that they do. Maybe that will shed a little light on why this division is so "celebrated.")

Authorities at Fort Bragg have begun an inquiry into whether the paratroopers' actions violated the military conduct code.
Division spokeswoman Maj. Amy Hannah declined to say how many paratroopers are involved or identify their unit within the division. A defense official speaking on condition of anonymity said up to seven soldiers are involved.

Maj. Todd Vician, a Defense Department spokesman in Washington, said the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy states that "homosexual orientation alone is not a bar to service, but homosexual conduct is incompatible with military service."

(BUNNY NOTE: So is common sense, considering the military's current mission.)

"We define homosexual conduct as homosexual acts or verbal or non-verbal communication that a member is homosexual," Vician said.
The 82nd Airborne is one of the most celebrated units in the military. Its 15,000 troops are trained to deploy anywhere in the world within 18 hours.

(BUNNY NOTE: Ooh, I bet they cum on command, too.)