September 10, 2008


As New York is all abuzz with fashion week's junkies sussing out the latest trend, a super-expensive accessory has emerged in recent months: the gaybie. Yes, both Ricky Martin and Clay Aiken both have sired children out of wedlock recently. (Bastards are really making a comeback!) Rod Townsend takes an in-depth look at this faggy phenomenon in Radar.


CHILDREN OF MEN: Meet Hollywood's hottest new accessory: the gaybie

By Rod Townsend

An excerpt:

Tom Ford wardrobes, Fire Island homes, and Le Corbusier chaises have long been coveted power gay accessories, but now celebrities like Clay Aiken and Ricky Martin are flaunting a new, even more exclusive essential: the gaybie.
Yes, the gaybie. A baby gayness hath wrought. Found sashaying down the uteri of surrogate mothers worldwide, providing self-actualization and status-faction to Hollywood's single fathers. (For the sake of brevity, and legality, "I consider sort of obviously gay despite publicist claims" is herein truncated simply as "gay.")

Gaybies buck the celebrity trend of adopting internationally. Take the August births of Parker Foster Aiken (son of Clay) and the as-of-yet-unnamed Martin twins. (Conceived with Ricky Martin's sperm and the egg of an unknown.) For one brief tabloid moment, both births stole Brangelina's thunder and brought attention to the hip new test-tube alternative for committed bachelors.