August 28, 2014


Did Obama literally just give a press conference to essentially say:

"Yes, we are going back into Iraq, which I once called "the dumb war"--but this time we admit we admit that we don't have a strategy. Next question."

When asked how complicated the situation is.

"Yes, we are both fighting ISIS in Iraq and aiding them in Syria, but the Americans are so dumb we can get away with it by showing a journalist being beheaded. That means we have to attack someone, because our own are being threatened abroad. Most are never going to take the time to understand the ancient allegiances between warring tribes or that ISIS rose to power because the US destroyed Iraq. And never mind that American diplomats could easily be airlifted out of trouble zones to safety, eliminating the need to attack. We've already lost the American public completely by sometimes referring to these terrorists as ISIS and sometimes as ISIL. Bush got the dummies to support attacking Iraq after 9/11 even though it had nothing to do with 9/11 and had no weapons of mass destruction, fer chrissakes!. And Kerry and I almost got them to go into Syria by replaying footage of gassed children." So US foreign policy doesn't have to make sense. I'll take one more question."

When asked if he was overextending the power of power among the three branches of government by seizing more power for the executive branch just like George W. Bush, he basically said:

"You clearly see how I'm abusing my office, but most Americans are either too dumb or don't care that we are creating a king instead of a president who is above the Constitution, which clearly states that Congress must approve any war. And I can always say I need to act decisively and alone because of the do-nothing Congress. Even though all members of both parties in Congress just miraculously came together to vote on authorizing more money for Israel to attack Palestinians and further destabilize the region that we are, in theory, trying to stabilize. Because we need military bases all over the Middle East because of oil. So America get ready to have your kids die in a war you don't understand to line the pockets of corporations who bribed me and everyone else in the government. Thank you."