February 03, 2013


Tan Mom did not disappoint at Hot Mess last night. The tabloid queen is an uncontrollable nut and was getting sauced early in the evening. But she was back at XL to 'clear her name" since her last scandalous appearance at Hot Mess created international headlines as video of her she stumbling around the stage wasted went viral. We all joined together right before we went on in a backstage pep rally and she was cheerful and always vocal. She refused a drink onstage, though she was clearly on something--is the teeth gnashing of prescription drugs a la Paula Abdul.. (She accepted one drink shortly after that while judging the Hot Mess competition.) But she wasn't completely blithering--she's just a Class A kook. DJ David Serrano got her up to dance to Madonna's Lucky Star. Sadly that ended in a freeform choreography that landed in a squat which sort of stuck. And in one odd segment, she declared that she'd left her husband thanks to a girl she'd met last time she was at XL

She kept peering out in the audience skeptically and we realized that the "star" she kept complaining to Bianca Del Rio about was actually the spotlight, which she didn't care for. As Bianca pointed out, this is unusual for someone who clearly likes the even hotter lights of a tanning salon. We roasted her with a Laugh-In style joke routine. Dwayne Milan: "A homeless guy walks up to Tan Mom and says 'I know you can spare tan dollars." Mine was "Many of you have expressed concern about Tan Mom's daughter but Patricia assures us that she's not only doing well in school, but the girl has become a Brownie!." Ba-dum-pum! Anyhoo, it was great to re-join the cast of Hot Mess for their one year anniversary! 

FROM LEFT-RIGHT:That's DjCollins Skyla Versai dressed as our guest star, Milan, Sugga Pie Koko, Ebonee Excell, Brandon L Voss and Tan Mom with our weekly male dancers right be the show started, when I supposed Miss del Rio was changing.Glad to see Rockit! AND HOT MESS Friday's are still going strong despite the frigid weather! EverY Friday night at 10PM which will blow your mind! No cover charge unless you make  a table reservation which is a good bit pricier. It was lovely to reconvene with the cast, Bianca and our boss, Brandon Voss. As my broken toe improves, I'll be appearing at Hot Mess more often. 

Tan Mom was interviewed by Howard Stern recently. While she may be drunk in a night club setting, she's drinking water here. She admits that some guy in a bar "cold-cocked" her, which I guess means hitting her in the head. He did it so hard that she had to have 4 operations and has several plates in her head, which she attributes her dizziness and lack of equilibrium to.