November 23, 2009


Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 6:30 AM
Subject: Things you can't say when you're drunk...

Things that are difficult to say when you’re drunk:

* Innovative
* Preliminary
* Proliferation
* Cinnamon

Things that are VERY difficult to say when you’re drunk:

* Specificity
* British Constitution
* Passive-aggressive disorder
* Transubstantiate

Things that are DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE to say when you’re drunk:

* Thanks, but I don’t want to sleep with you.
* Nope, no more booze for me.
* Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
* Good evening officer, isn’t it lovely out tonight?
* I’m not interested in fighting you.
* Oh, I just couldn’t – no one wants to hear me sing.
* No, I wont make any attempt to dance thanks, I have zero co-ordination.
* Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to urinate over the nearest cash machine or shop front.