PENNE WITH PENIS, ANYONE?

FROM NEWS.COM.AU:

Driver convicted for penis in pasta jar


A MAN caught by police with his penis inside a pasta sauce jar was still pleasuring himself while resisting arrest, a court has been told.

Police drew their weapons after New South Wales man Keith Roy Weatherley, 46, led them on a brief, slow-speed car chase, the Newcastle Herald reports.

Weatherley attracted police attention while he was parked in a no-stopping zone near Nobby's Beach on October 26, Newcastle Local Court was told yesterday.

Police thought he might have a weapon because they saw him doing something with his hands in his lap, the Herald said.

Instead, they found him partially clothed with his genitals in a jar, a police statement said.

That's when the pursuit began, the court was told.

When Weatherley was stopped, he refused to leave his car and four officers used batons and capsicum spray to get him out.

They found a 750mm jar around his penis and said Weatherley attempted to continue "pleasuring himself in between bouts of wrestling".

A search of his car uncovered pornography, a homemade sex aid, women's stockings and a Jack Russell terrier.

Weatherley pleaded guilty to offensive behaviour, resisting police and disobeying a police direction.

He was convicted and fined $600.


I SURE WISH THERE WAS A PHOTO!

ACTUALLY, YOU'RE IN LUCK. I HAPPENED TO HAVE A TRICK OVER AND GOT HIM TO SHOVE HIS STILL-ENGORGED COCK INTO A SPAGHETTI JAR, WHICH I ACTUALLY RACED TO THE GROCERY STORE TO PURCHASE AND HASTILY CLEAN BEFORE HE ARRIVED--ALL FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE!



Apparently, I chose the right trick for my little excursion into photography. I was telling him--let's call him Carlos--about how insane it was that the guy kept "wrestling" away to masturbate with the jar while the police had him in custody. Carlos was able to explain the situation since he himself had used what he termed a fifi (sp?) in jail. A fifi, he explained, was when you took one glove and put a little water in it, then somehow surrounded it with a dry glove and a rolled up towels and fucked the wrist area. He said "You don't know! Some guys fall in love with a bottle."