August 12, 2006


The new version is out!

1 You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your b ack and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12.. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You w onder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.


Blogger Tommy said...

...Lady Bunny is the female rabbit you screwed out behind the shed...

11:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

31 - when you think a lady bunny is your lucky night, better n nutin

12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

gurrrrrl you are too much!

12:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now, what was this again, Lady Bunny's "To Do" List?

Note to self

Low on kitchen table raid

pick up case at wal*marks

1:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I too qualify as white trash due to my collection of cool Whip salad bowls and my bridal registery at Wal-mart. Trailer parks rool.

2:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


3:43 PM  
Blogger Tommy Lee said...

you know your a redneck when you use the ironing board as a buffet table, I think one of my friends did that once... LOL

6:48 PM  
Blogger Beth Austin said...

"You know your a redneck when..."

You don't understand the concept of contractions and use "your" instead of "you're." Ahem.

1:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


9:36 PM  

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