February 04, 2006


A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two
drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, "I'm on
this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.." The
bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink.
In fact, this one is on me."

As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I would
like to buy you a drink, too."

The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two
drops of water." "Coming up," says the bartender. As she finishes
that drink, the man to her left says, "I would like to buy you one,

The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with
two drops of water." "Coming right up," the bartender says. As he
gives her the drink, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the
Scotch with only two drops of water?"

The old woman replies, "Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to
hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue."

"OLD" IS WHEN ... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love,"
And you answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!" "OLD " IS WHEN ... Your
friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker
The garage door.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as
you don't have to go along.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead
of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN ..."Getting a little action" means you don't need to take
any fiber today

"OLD" IS WHEN ... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking

"OLD" IS WHEN ... An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the


"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are not sure these are jokes.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

old is when you look like a cross between Dame Barbara Cartland and the Queen Mother and your initials are LB - we ain't talkin Lady Bird Johnson either.

10:36 AM  
Blogger Lady Bunny said...

Well, at least I constirct my nut-sack when wearing minis, unlike Pete Browns--I mean Burns. But then again, Pete probably doesn't have a picture of me performing on his site, now does he? --B

11:12 AM  
Blogger Lady Bunny said...

Dear Anonymous, I worship Barbara Cartland! Thank you! --B

11:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your most lovingly welcome, I and we all love and worship you and your ability to allow jokes at your expense, as long as their funny ! we need comedy! now more than ever. Thank you for you.

11:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

old is when your chins hang lower than your nuts.

8:28 PM  
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4:39 PM  
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6:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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4:14 AM  
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5:24 PM  

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