September 25, 2011

I'M SO NERVOUS!

Performing at my 1st Folsom Street Fest in San Fran today. It's a hole day outing and I'm nervous that I'm forgetting something. Any hints for a novice appreciated! I've got poppers in a IV, HIV, lube, gerbils, gerbil food (they need strength to kick at my prostate all day), bright paints for my cantaloupe-sized pumped testicles to lure kids into thinking they're balloons, dog collar--in case I see Chi Chi Larue. Oh, and I've eaten a huge breakfast and made a thermos of espresso to satisfy the scat queens!Have I missed anything?

UPDATE:

Thank you, San Francisco! This old whore has been to quite a few festivals and even thrown a few. But y'all knocked my socks off with that Folsom Street mess today! Lady Bunion's hooves are worn off dancing to Billie Ray Martin, The Miracles Club and Hard Ton. I found the house music stage and was grooving to Beth Ditto and a slammin' remix of There's Some Hoes In This House which truly fit the occasion!