July 31, 2007


Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's as funny as it is coherent? Where did you find this dazzling gem? BillOReilly.com? kkk.org?

12:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nostradamus Bunny, I am in awe with your amazing predictions. I hoping that if I stick around for long enough scientists will put in a good word for Charlie!

4:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love a corny joke as much as the next guy, but wouldn't this make more sense if it said 2019 HEADLINES? I mean 2009 is a bit over 1 year away and I doubt Chelsea will be President by then.

10:48 AM  
Blogger Star Queen said...

West Coast blown into Pacific ocean by the terrorists

in state of emegency Bush regime invokes police state act passed in 2006

12:47 AM  

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